5 things naija lady should never do after breaking up relationship

Pretend you’re fine

Cry. Punch a pillow. Surr ound yourself with friends who

listen. Whatever it takes to get over the initial shock and

sorrow.

It is tempting to pretend you’re unaffected by the

breakup; don’t let pride get in the way of being real.

While sobbing at the office may be a step too far,

remember that it’s okay to be angry, hurt or humiliated,

and far healthier to express yourself honestly than grow

numb.

Try to be “just friends”

Very rarely can a breakup lead to a solid friendship,

especially when it is recent.

Until you’re okay with the idea of your ex dating someone

new — and vice versa — it is wise to create some

intentional space.

If your ex is being pushy about staying friends, stand

your ground and let yourself mourn the end of the

relationship.

Seek revenge

While the thought of keying his his car, kidnapping his

cat, or destroying his stuff may sound like a good idea in

your head, don't do anything malicious or that could land

you in legal trouble.

You may have been deeply wronged, but “getting even”

won’t heal any wounds. Choose to take the high road and

forgive and move on.

Communicate. In any format

Tempted to text or call your ex about it. Don’t.

There will be times when it’s important to communicate

with an ex. Maybe you need to return his things? Maybe

you have to deal with a shared lease, or pet custody?

However, resist the urge to call or text whenever you

would have when you were still dating.

Overcome the void a break up causes by recruiting a

support system of friends and family to help you fill the

time normally spent with a significant other.

Many people feel lost after a breakup; not because they

miss their ex, but because so many of their daily habits

once revolved around someone else.

Give yourself some time to adapt to single life.

Beg for reconciliation

Yes, dogs can get away with begging. But you can't.

There are plenty of reasons for not wanting to let go, but

instead of clinging to lost hope find a wise friend who

can help you walk through the reasons why you’re having

a hard time letting go.

Don’t beg for him/her to return. Deep down, you know

that you don’t want to be in a relationship with someone

you had to beg to be with you.

Besides, if your ex rejects you a second time, it won’t

just hurt; the rejection will sting with extra humiliation

and regret.

Sleep together

Don’t do it. No woman on her deathbed says, “I really

wish I slept with my ex-husband one last time.”

Let the break be clean.

Facebook-stalk your ex

Social media can be dangerous at the best of times, but

when dealing with heartache you should be extra

cautionary.

Give yourself two rules: Don’t post anything about the

breakup drama online, including those vague and

ambiguous quotes, and resist the urge to stalk your ex.

“De-friending” or at least hiding statuses can help you

avoid the constant temptation to check in and see if your

ex is living a life more miserable or better than yours.

Get a haircut — or tattoo

It’s easy to make rash decisions post-breakups. One

major change in your life can inspire even more change.

If you have a tattoo-design epiphany in the days

following heartache, wait a few months before acting on

it.

You may think a new hairstyle will make you feel better,

but be warned: a bad bowl cut can hurt your already-

bruised confidence. Don’t kick yourself when you’re

down.

Give up

Take some time to refocus and pursue the things you’ve

always loved to do. Spend time with loved ones and

learn to love the single life again.

Value the lessons learned from the relationship that just

ended and move forward. And be thankful that the wrong

relationship ended to free you up for the right one.

Avoid meeting someone new

Don’t give up on meeting your perfect match.

Once you're ready to dip your toe back into the dating

game there are plenty of ways to meet new people - from

online dating to starting a new hobby or exercise class.